Wednesday 17 March 2010

The Right Way To Get Your Boyfriend Back Why Your Next Move Will Make It Or Break It

The Right Way To Get Your Boyfriend Back Why Your Next Move Will Make It Or Break It
After the breakup you're left standing alone with a broken heart trying to pick up the pieces of your relationship. Your ex isn't returning your calls or texts and as the clock slowly ticks away you feel him slipping though your fingers, but what's killing you deep inside is that you have no idea where to start or what to do to get him back.

If this is where you're at right now, take comfort. Everyone from every walk of life at some point in time has broken up with someone, so even though you may feel alone, you're not. Many couples break up but more importantly many of these couples also make up.

It's important for you to know that no matter how your relationship ended or what caused it, you can always get back with your ex. I want you to take a minute to stop and picture yourself in an open space with no one around.

Now I want you to imagine that there are several different paths around you leading you away in every possible direction. These paths represent the many different roads you can take to get your boyfriend back. Most will lead you away from him, but there are a few that will land you right back in his arms.

Knowing which paths you should or shouldn't take is key here. If you choose wrong and go down the wrong path for too long, you'll push him away. However if you pick the right path at the right time you can not only get back together but you can do it in record time.

There's one thing you have that gives you an advantage over everyone else and that's knowledge. You may not know it, but getting back together with your ex is a skill that needs to be learned an implemented and the more you understand your ex's mindset and like's and dislike's the better your chances are of saying and doing the right things to get him back.

At the end of the day it's all about how you time things with him. You still need to choose the right path to go down, but more importantly you need to do it at the correct speed. Move to fast and he'll bolt the other way. Don't move at all and he'll lose interest in you and your window of opportunity will be gone.

Knowing where you need to start is the main thing here. There are many fast methods and techniques available to you to guide you to take those first steps along the correct path. Learn what you should and shouldn't do directly below before making your next move.

AVOIDING THE BIGGEST POST-BREAKUP MISTAKES


The timeline directly after the break up is the most important. In large part, what you do next will determine if you get back together or not. Most people think that doing something, anything at all is better than nothing, which leads them down the wrong path and only makes the problem worse.

It's important for you to know at this time that your mistakes will be put under the microscope. I know you want to take action and stop the break up from continuing, but at this point in time, the more you try and help the situation the worse it will become.

Right now you're at your lowest point emotionally. You've got thousands of thoughts running around in your head and you don't know how to deal with them and it's easer to act than to sit and think things through.

Despair, agony, anger, bitterness... it doesn't take a lot right now to do or say something you'll regret later and any over-reaction by you could drive him further away and make any chance of getting back together more difficult or maybe even impossible.

Running after, begging, pleading, stalking... you may think that these actions will cause your ex to change his mind about you when in reality you're shooting yourself in the foot.

Let me take you into the mind of a guy after a breakup:


"WHEN I BREAK UP WITH A GIRL THE LAST THING I NEED IS TO HEAR FROM HER BECAUSE EVERY CONVERSATION IS CENTERED AROUND THE RELATIONSHIP AND GETTING BACK TOGETHER."

"IT'S DIFFICULT TO TALK TO HER KNOWING THAT SHE STILL WANTS YOU BACK, SOMETIMES YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU SHOULD SAY. AND WHATEVER YOU DO SAY WON'T MAKE HER HAPPY, SO THE IDEAL THING TO DO IS TO AVOID HER."

"IF SHE KEEPS CALLING AND TEXTING THINGS TEND TO GET OUT OF HAND FAST, AND SOON SHE'S ANGRY AT YOU AS WELL AS BEING UPSET. BREAKING UP IS STRESSFUL ENOUGH WITHOUT THE ADDITIONAL DRAMA."

You see, there's no early quick solution for your break up and when you move too quickly too early, your ex boyfriend's first instinct is to avoid you not draw closer to you. It's possible you could make him upset and resentful which could make things uncomfortable for the both of you and when you're eventually able to get back with him he'll remember the uncomfortable feelings and it will be a roadblock for you.

THE FIRST MOVE AFTER THE BREAKUP


As strange as it may seem, the best thing you can do after your boyfriend breaks up with you is to let him walk away.

It's that simple. I know it sounds weird but when you let him out of the relationship without any fighting or harsh feelings you gain his respect and that puts you in the driver's seat. Having his respect is a critical step in getting him back again.

What's even better is as your ex and you part ways, he's going to wonder why you're not frantically chasing after him dong everything in your power to keep the relationship going. By keeping things neutral between you two you throw him off his game.

Walking away from the relationship on good terms is going to drive him crazy and what's more he'll feel like YOU rejected HIM.

Although he started the separation, he relied on the fact that you still loved him and banked on the fact that you'd try and talk him out of it. Without doubt he expected you to chase him and try and keep the relationship going.

But instead of the reaction he expected from you, you've just up and walked away from the relationship and he's left standing there wondering how much you really value the relationship. He might even think that you're into someone else and for all he knows you're into the breakup as much as he is.

WHY AGREEING WITH THE BREAKUP WORKS


You might have read a lot about this theory already and that's because accepting your fate and the situation instead of fighting it puts you in a position of strength.

If you want to end up back together again, any action you take ought to be done from a position of power and control. If you don't have this, you won't get very far.

Consider this one point. Your ex had an expectation about how you would react to the breakup and every time you do something unanticipated you gain more power and control over what will happen next. By going against the grain in a breakup you're actually taking control and steering it back to reconciliation. That's how you get him back.

It's impossible for him to argue with you when you agree to the breakup because it aligns your interests thereby throwing him off his game.

WHAT TO DO IF YOUR BREAK UP ALREADY HAPPENED


In the event you and your ex-boyfriend have already been separated for some time then agreeing to the breakup might not be right for you now, particularly if you fought against the breakup to begin with.

Luckily for you it's not too late for you to take a similar course of action. You can still detach yourself from the relationship and show your ex that you've made peace with the situation and accepted the breakup. Learning how to implement this simple yet effective trick can put you back on track to getting him back.

The best part about this is that even if you haven't talked to your ex in a while, this trick opens the door again and allows you to re-enter the picture and capture his attention and show him that you're moving on without him.

Once you've mastered this procedure the next thing you have to do is use the detachment technique to pull him nearer and when you've done that there are 5 minor adjustments you can make that will make him want you back.

View Article Source


0 comments:

Post a Comment